Everyone needs some privacy

Tuesday, 25 October 2016

Erotic Genre: How real can/should you be?

Sex with a ghost isn’t very real – unless you truly believe.

Sex with a werewolf? Vampire? Okay, way stranger images are coming to mind now.

I’m thinking the nitty-gritty. Basic human beings. How real should the sex be?


Is the erotic audience ready for the turn-on, fantasy, reality, escape, wishful thinking and/or do they want it down and real?

How is real – sexy? Is the mundane ever sexy? Do we secretly want our erotic read to be relatable as we pretend to friends it’s really fantasy we’re after?

Does this mean we can feel rejected by a book’s hot lover just because we think we’re inadequate? Do beautifully perfect people scare us – maybe they want us?

The truth is, as it is for all writing, be real to the story you’re telling, nothing less or nothing much more is ever needed. 

Tuesday, 11 October 2016

General: Thoughts on short story writing

They’re over before you have a chance to get bored with the writing. Or, bored with the reading.

Problem – they’re over before you want them to be. Or, need them to be.

I find short stories easier to write. It’s due to my natural urge to rush through the ending. Why I become bored I don’t understand. I feel the need to write and have a vivid imagination, but I always hit a point in which I find myself rushing. Maybe I need to plan more.

This is why short stories, so far, appear to work for me. I try to give as much as I can and still maintain the requirements of short writing.

Shorts allow for more formula writing. More point-form aspects of what is needed and mindful of the word count. Not as much fullness or spreading out of points.

But, it would be great to be able to write longer sections to a full novel – get to spend more time with these mind-friends of mine.

Tuesday, 4 October 2016

Visiting Bonnie and Boris: Introducing the Children

Why write erotic and have the characters have children? Isn’t bringing in children counterproductive to a sex-filled story – an eww factor?

In my youth there was a talk/variety show that once had a relationship expert on. The show actually put up a warning and had the teen guest leave the set – ahh the 70s. Anyhoo, this expert said something that has stuck with me – we are free and easy before marriage because we really have no role model on how to date. How to romance during this time.

But, once we are married we end up following our parental role models. If we don’t witness them acting romantic or loving – not sexual – we start behaving as if this non-behaviour is normal and expected. Hence the belief marriage kills romance; kills the sex.

Which is one reason I wanted my couple to be the normal family. A couple making time for each other and being interrupted by the kids. Having to juggle the embarrassing moments those of us with kids have probably all experienced.

There’s also the idea of these children growing and finding their parents have had an interesting sex/love life. That the people around them have meant so much more. Seeing our parents as human is always one of the breakthroughs which startle us the most.

Too much for short sexy stories? Maybe, but this is what makes writing fun – exploring human nature.

Tuesday, 27 September 2016

Character Take Over: RE-visiting with Boris

Who are you?

Boris Carmichael Schitz…I know already it sounds like Shits. Yes, my buddies never let me forget it. Can we move on now? Yes, not our real last name, but trust me the real one is just as awkward for a guy growing up. Told Bonnie we should have used her maiden name.

My business is a mix of architectural design and personal security. Safe rooms and home vaults as well as business and business travel. My company will provide drivers, travel aids and security right down to family childcare help.

My family’s safety is everything.

What do you do in your spare time?

Look, I live in a household with four women of various ages, I do what they tell me to do. Seriously, between going over risk assessments, meetings with clients (and, yes, some think security means not sharing everything I need to know to do my job for them which is a whole other headache), staying on top of training and ahead of potential vulnerabilities, and more, cleaning the garage, trips to dance class, and playing chauffeur to a gaggle of girls is relaxation. Sports? Golf is a business drudgery as far as I’m concerned, but you’ll be surprised at how much can be covered over beers and darts. Let alone when training with the guys at the gym.


Look, I leave that spare time talk to Bonnie. Any discussions I may have on that activity I keep private.


Business takes me throughout the area and sometimes the country. There have been world travels, too. Plus connections and working relationships with other trusted security companies.

That, again?  Wherever my gal is works for me.


All right, I give in…

Hey, I’m a guy. Basically, whenever.


You’re kidding me right?


How what? You just…crap, Bonnie answered this already, right?

Conclusion…ahhh…oh, about the book…it was fun at the time, fun remembering (maybe a little more fun), and fun reading, trying to read   LOL

Tuesday, 20 September 2016

Visiting Bonnie and Boris: RE-introducing Boris

Who is Boris and why is he so free and open with his wife?

Too good to be true?



I wanted Boris to be more of a secondary character. Someone sitting quietly in the background enjoying the show. I really didn’t want to deal with him as a main focal. As an equal to Bonnie’s character – the lead, the story POV.

Then, Lea, my publisher said something about there would need to be some conflict, eventually. Something between Bonnie and Boris…jealously, something they would have to acknowledge, deal with as a couple.


I became the author who argued.

Argued that, no, my characters do not have that problem. They are the couple who know their hearts and minds. Who trust and love each other.

If you listen to the world beyond your comfort zone…the one that makes adults giggle with titillation. Then you have to acknowledge some people like _____ and ______ or ______. That they are comfortable and accept these different lifestyles no matter what anyone thinks.

Lo and behold Boris was born. He became the male lead. The protector. The supporter. The lover who cherishes his wife and isn’t afraid to follow her desires. Not afraid to show his own.

Together they explore the world few of us – sorry for the assumption – dare. Together they are the love story of our hearts. The trust and belief we have in our own lover(s).

Tuesday, 13 September 2016

Character Take Over: RE-visiting with Bonnie

Who are you?

I’m Bonnie Marie Schitz, nee Southfenn, mother to three girls, married to Boris since our early twenties, hitting the 20th anniversary soon. I work from home as an online PR expert specializing in social media, something I’ve finally been able to do fulltime which allowed me to leave the office job.

What do you do in your spare time?

It depends. Most times those moments are spent with the family, when we all have the same spare moments. Otherwise I like to read and just sit back at home, no I don’t bake cookies. I lean more toward cupcakes and muffins.

Oh you mean, what do I do as in that do? Most times it’s all the spur of the moment. Nothing really is ever planned. Well, a few times require planning. Being spontaneous is great; however, there are situations one must be prepared for.


Where do I live or where do we…play? To protect my family I won’t say where we live, but we do have seasonal changes if that’s enough for you.

Our activities? Our bedroom, where only Cassie has been over to join. It’s our trusted sanctuary. But, we’ve ventured other places. Our friends, Peter and Patrice, have a private club that offers interesting shows. They’ve had us to their home. Everyone we bring close to us understands our home is a No zone. Even then we don’t bring many over who we’ve met at different places.


As I mentioned, some activities require planning, others were either unexpected or possibilities that we were open to. But those times were always with people we trusted and knew beyond doubt.

Let’s face it, being sexually adventuresome requires an emotional and intelligential element beyond practise and training and know how. Health is foremost in our minds.


If feels good? Curiosity?

Look, I know some will look at me and Boris and think I’m slutty or he’s scum. That we’re nothing but perverted. I’m not going to change their minds, won’t even try. Others, I hope, are interested in knowing who we are and are simply curious…which is fine. Human nature is diverse and each of us is here to explore and discover. Boris and I didn’t start out sharing, we, well he and Cassie opened a door they both knew I was curious about, one they both were wondering about as well. We’re well-adjusted adults. We know our boundaries and what we value most.



Oh, while I just explained how it started. The technical aspect, well I think we all know that.

But the other how involves openness to those who you plan to be intimate with. Health checks and tests. Verifying others are as well. And precautions and protection.

No, we don’t share all the coverings and usings. Who really wants to read those timeouts when you want to read the active parts?

Unless, of course, the timeouts are more timeins and active bits of the whole. Using safety doesn’t’ need to be boring.

Thank you for letting me say Hi, and I do hope you’ll give My Love and my stories a chance.